Tuesday, July 31, 2012

A New Queen: Trying to Find Her Way

While overall, I (I believe we) are enjoying what FLR is bringing to our marriage, like anything it takes work. It is especially more difficult since this is not just a bedroom game for us at the present; we are trying to incorporate the philosophy into our lifestyle. I think my biggest challenge these last few weeks has been living a true "Queen" life--making decisions and acting through my wishes and desires. I have been trying to make the bedroom experiences during the permitted release sessions more about what my knight desires--trying to offer some "gifts." Also, one of my wants is to please him and connect through sex; I enjoy sex with him greatly.  Furthermore, FLR has been happening in our daily lives as well. It is extremely difficult for me to not do routine housework that I have done for years: dishes, laundry, cooking, etc. I enjoy this perk a great deal; it is very appreciated and I believe will be an even greater service on his part once I am back to work next week and continue my studies as well. In addition to housework, he encourages me to be harder on him, yet when this has been practiced, it doesn't seem to go well.

The biggest letdown is that by not listening to my inner self, I believe, I disappointed my knight. Although in this journey he will learn to put my needs first, this time he was disappointed on a more intimate (as in connection, not sex) level. We are moving forward, and I hope to try and find my voice in this role. I do believe that we are communicating very well, and my sex drive has been amazing--I walk around as a pulsing, cream-making machine. Not to mention I enjoy the tease sessions where I let him out to stretch and usually dip (mouth and pussy), and the power to not permit him to cum is empowering and sexy.

We are learning our rules (and interpretations of them) and developing forms of punishment--which he seems to enjoy a little too much to be called punishment. I have a difficult time both enforcing and dishing out. However, I am getting better with practice, and he seems to truly fear the ball slaps (one of my favorites). My new switch is on the way and through a forum I learned that a fly swatter might be fun; I plan to try this week to punish him for some rule infractions. Even harder than the punishment is the humiliation. This is not a part of me. While easier to do during sex (as fantasy play for him), I don't feel the way he does about his cock, so the humiliation is not genuine. In addition, I am not one who likes to hurt people with words. This a place we need to find balance--or maybe it will get easier with practice (as the physical has).

Lastly, while he may have fantasies of him being my cuckold, I have NO plans to sleep with others. Flirting is my limit. Some may consider FLR too kinky (others not kinky enough); however, I take my marriage and vows very seriously and will not be taking other men. After all, I am Queen, and that is my choice. Besides with the blogs and forums, we have strangers in our bedroom (and life) all the time.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

To Cum or Not to Cum

Oh, I am very excited about Saturday. My knight has sent me menus for approval--of course I have picked a place that had two entrees that I could not choose between, so I will order both--one for him and one for me and I will eat some of both. I can't wait to be more openly domme with him too. It's a little practice session. I need practice. My punishment practice went pretty well last weekend. The photo posted was a fresh shot, the bruises came out a couple of days later. This week, however, he has been a good, submissive boy, exercising when told, refraining from masturbation all week, hoping to be given the gift of cumming in my pussy for our anniversary. He has a goal of making me cum at least 5 times first. I prefer 7, a record for me. It may be a long night for him with a great deal of teasing, before he is permitted to release. I cannot wait to restrain him and tease the hell out of his cock. Demanding he not cum until I am pleased. He has gotten pretty good at waiting until I am on my last one, so we can cum together. That would be nice. I hope he is good while we are out. I would hate to ruin his orgasm or not allow one at all. I am sure he will blog about it next week--good or bad. 

I am curious, what do you think? It's only been a week since his last release. Should he get the anniversary gift of cumming in my pussy? Maybe I should make him clean his mess! :)
Please submit a vote/comment. 

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Hers is a Luscious Pussy....His is a Pathetic Cock...

I sit here in my hotel room, medium-sized butt plug inserted to remind me of my new found subservient place in the world, considering the dichotomy of the sexual organs of my beautiful wife and I. First, there is my wife the Queen, with the most luscious pussy that I have ever experienced (and yes I have experienced a good number). Her love box is well equipped, with the ability to coyly say….”hey, come on in.” This despite the fact that my Queen has only been with two men (including me) in her lifetime. Her pussy just rocks it, getting incredibly wet with the right stimuli and a clit that will get the size of a Jelly Bean and throb like a pulsing heart.  Her pussy, once worked over and well stretched can take enormous objects. She has a very large black dildo that we very nearly threw away because it was just too big, but any more, when the Queen is feeling good and horny and is nice and wet, she can swallow up that massive black cock before you know it without difficulty. And then there is my pathetic cock. It has not always been so, it was once larger and performed much better, but anymore, my cock has shrunk to a tiny little pathetic cock. Worse yet, Queen’s nickname for my cock is QAR (Quick at Release), because unless I put a numbing agent on, or a condom, or both, I usually cum within seconds of entering Queen, sometimes literally after one or two strokes.  Very often (more often than not), after Queen has been worked over by her dildos, including the massive black one, she has me enter her from behind. Queen loves me very much, and I know this, but she has finally confessed to me that very often, she can’t even tell whether my cock is in her or not. I truly have a pathetic little cock that is unable to satisfy my amazing, beautiful and sensuous Queen. She really does deserve better. I only hope my loyal service and discipline can keep her happy.

Queen Shows That She Can and Will Punish...

I have been traveling as of late for work. Last week, my Queen locked me up before we parted. I had used one of the longer pins on my CB3000 because I thought it would be more comfortable at night. Unfortunately, my first day alone on the road, as I was bending over to pick up the newspaper, I slipped out of my device. It was absolutely unintentional, yet I was worried about what my Queen might do. I reported it to her asap. Unfortunately, she had taken the other security seal tags, and I could not locate my lock. What this ultimately led to was me being very bad and defiant, masturbating (that is one of my major vices) several times a day. I estimate that I masturbated 20-30 times that week. Something that I am horrible at is lying to my Queen. She truly is my soul mate and I feel duty-bound to be honest with her. I confessed my transgressions. We had house guests when I got home that week, so although I could tell Queen was simmering over my defiance of her rules, my corrective training would have to wait until Saturday.  Saturday afternoon quickly arrived and our guests departed. I knew that the evening would bring my Queen’s wrath down upon me. She had me go out and pick some new switches (her preferred punishment method). I soaked them for her in the bathtub with salt water. Queen had requested I order a restraint system the week before, and I installed it on her bed. Once the kids were in bed and Queen and I were alone in the sanctuary of our bedroom, she had me lie face down on the bed and she secured me in the restraining device, systematically going around and tightening each limb to insure I had no slack. First, she gave me what felt like a sensuous massage, rubbing my back and body. Then she cinched the straps once more until she was satisfied I was secure. Then she stuffed some of her dirty panties in my mouth as a gag, grabbed one of her switches and began to pace around the bed like a wolf stalking its prey. She was talking, lecturing, telling me I was about to learn my lesson and that by the time she was done, I would know enough to keep my hands off of HER cock. She would taunt me and then bring the switch down swiftly, sometimes for a single blow and sometimes for multiple quick hits. This sweet girl who “didn’t get into punishment” certainly seemed to be hitting her stride in teaching me a lesson on how it was against the rules to masturbate. This continued for some time, as Queen had assessed me with 50 lashes. She had given me a taste of 10 lashes the night before, so I had 40 to serve. Even in servitude, I sometimes have the unfortunate habit of opening my mouth and being stubborn. Near the 40 lash mark, as Queen asked me how my ass was feeling I told her something to the effect that it “felt fine and her beating wasn’t shit. When are you really gonna hit me…” or something to that effect. Obviously, this was not a wise choice of words given the timing and my position. Queen brought her switch down upon my ass with such force that it broke the switch. Not deterred, she broke off the end, and started beating me with the thicker portion of the switch stick. Queen brought several blows down swiftly. The whole time, she had been counting. She was now up to 36, and she raised the stick high over her head and brought it down swiftly upon my ass. She went back around to the other side of the bed and with the flick of the wrist gave me two more. Then came the last, very hard hit. My ass was left bloodied, bruised and burning. She told me I was lucky my butt plug hadn’t come in yet or it would have been in the whole time as she was punishing me. Once I was done serving my punishment, Queen rubbed and stroked me, cleaning up my ass. While my words of defiance may have spoken otherwise, I had learned a number of lessons. First, that my Queen, despite her sweet loving nature, could be brutal and highly effective with her switch when she needed to dole out punishment to me. Moreover, while I have a pretty good ability to tolerate pain and punishment, there were times during this beating that my ass definitely hurt. I will be more compliant to the rules and the desires of my Queen in the future.

Friday, July 20, 2012

A New Queen's Perspective...

I wasn't sure about this whole D/s lifestyle, and I am still a little skeptical. I am a pretty conservative, good girl and have been surprised at some of the "things" that I have done with my knight prior to his knighthood (sex in the back of pick-up truck on the side of the road, sex on a veranda, sex chats, etc.). While I still have my concerns about resentment (and my own guilt) or even his ability to stay in his place (he can be pretty stubborn--and actually enjoys the punishment), I had noticed with the experimentation in the Spring that my pussy was extremely wet and creamy. The first day he truly treated me as his queen, I was so wet that we did not need any lube (which is uncommon) AND I came without my vibrator. I have become a little desensitized over the years, burning through several vibrators a year and needing the highest powered ones on the market. Orgasms are harder to reach at times, but have been better and last longer. When my knight's new device (Mature Metal Jailbird) came this week, I grew quite excited. I actually was so aroused that I started to throb. I decided to undress and masturbate. I was so wet that I took my largest dildo (quite massive--one we almost threw away because it was painful at first) with no help at all. I also used the device to masturbate; it was hot; I was excited. This "good" girl turned sensual--video taping  the device going in and my pussy devouring it. Watching the video of myself as I taped it on my iphone made me even more excited. I decided to do something I have never done--send the video to my knight to show him the pussy he worships in action and to remind him that he will stay locked and not be worthy enough to experience my wet, loose, creamy pussy wrapped around his pathetic little cock unless he abides by the rules set. There are times after I play with my massive dildo that I will let knight enter me from behind. On these occasions I can hardly feel him inside me and he usually cums in seconds...it is really pitiful. His cock really is not worthy of entering my luscious pussy. He has a lot to do and prove. It will take a great deal of discipline and service to earn release--and it's been a while already since he has been able to release in this luscious pussy. Oh, he knows it is so worth it though. Even writing this makes me want to cum....oh, knight...It's been a week since my routine, daily servicing!

We are novices on this journey, whether you are a dominant wife or a submissive husband, we would like to hear from you.

Queen Keyholder

Monday, July 16, 2012

A New Journey Begins...

This blog documents the timeline and discoveries of the queen and her knight. Most of the documentation will be written by the knight with permission from his Queen. Caution: some or most of this material may be graphic.